Rowena
by myska-na-mrazu
Summary: Inspired by the Nikola Tesla: Lost Years initiative. It's a sunny October afternoon in 1950 when Nikola hands a book of Sudoku puzzles to an 8-year-old Rowena on a train. Little does he know how much their lives will become intertwined very soon...
1. Chapter 1

The train was due in three minutes. Nikola slowly walked to the front end of the platform just to have something to do. It wasn't worth it to take out a gift he had received from a friend at the office that day to study it in further detail, but still plenty of time for him to get bored.

He caught a short glimpse into a family life while he was standing there waiting, a mother and her little daughter playing some sort of a word game he had never come across before. He found himself watching with unexpected interest.

The train arrived, and for reasons Nikola didn't fully realise, he requested a seat opposite the charming mother and child. They acknowledged him with shiny smiles, and continued in their conversation. He could tell by their different accents that they were originally English, and suspected they came to the States after the war because there was nothing left for them at home. But the girl must have been very young when they had arrived, since her accent was leaning more towards the local one.

He remembered the book in his suitcase and took it out for further study. It was full of Japanese number puzzles he had yet been unfamiliar with, but the rules seemed straightforward enough, so he tried his luck right away.

He solved the first Sudoku, one from the section of the easiest one, in about a minute, which was quite disappointing. He flipped the pages to find the most difficult level, filled in a few more tables within two minutes and completely lost interest in this pastime.

"Here," he offered the book to the little girl opposite, "you try it."

The girl looked at her mother for approval, and when she got it, she accepted the sudden gift and stared at the puzzles, not sure what to do with them.

"What do you do with these?" she turned to Nikola for advice, and he gladly showed her, curious to see how she would do. She seemed intelligent enough and she looked like a child already in her school years.

He couldn't help watching her as she found the easiest puzzles and studied them intently to guess the missing numbers. After a while he realised that her mother was doing exactly the same thing and met her eyes and they smiled at each other.

"I'm Alice," she offered in an easy-going manner. "This is my daughter Rowena."

"I'm Nikola," he introduced himself as well. Rowena looked up from her puzzle and ventured: "Can I call you Nik?"

"Sure," Nikola smiled at her boldness in dealing with strangers. He could be charming, if he wanted to, and he did want to now. He found Alice and her daughter a very pleasant company.

He chatted with Alice for another quarter of an hour or so, during which time he found out that she came from a small English town called Letchworth, where she had worked in the Spirella Company. Her husband was an RAF pilot and didn't make it through the war. After it was all over, Alice had decided to leave her former nest of happiness behind and make a fresh start somewhere else.

She was just about to ask Nikola about his experience in the war when Rowena announced: "Done!" and shoved the book to Nikola's face proudly. He took the book from her hands carefully and looked at the result. There were no mistakes, but he hadn't even expected any. She was good, the little one.

"You're very clever," he gave her the praise she deserved, and she beamed at him and then at Alice.

"Can I try a more difficult one?" she asked, and received the book back immediately.

"Sure, it's yours," he said. "You can have all of them."

"Thank you, Nik," she chimed, and Alice echoed the words, obviously pleased that someone was treating her daughter as a father might, even if it was only for a short train ride.

"What do you do for a living, Nik?" Rowena inquired shamelessly. Having just been assured that the book was hers for the keeping, she felt in no hurry to solve all the puzzles she could until it was time to get off the train.

"I'm a scientist," he chose to say instead of inventor. "I work with electronics."

"You must be very clever, too, then," Rowena concluded matter-of-factly, and Nikola exchanged another smile with Alice; pleasantly surprised and amused at the same time. He loved the kid.

His smile abruptly froze on his lips when a terrifying sound of crashing metal tore through the train, and the carriage, derailed with massive momentum, was thrust off the elevated tracks, dragging the rest of the train down with it.

Instinctively, Nikola reached for his companions, trying to shield them from impact.

A few seconds of eerie silence, then nothing.


	2. Chapter 2

He must have died for a moment, because he felt his vampire self kicking him back to life. The pain in his chest was insufferable, and he could feel weight on his body, but could not really make out what it was for the sharp orange setting sun was flooding the train wreck. His ears started to notice screams, weeping and the piercing sound of sirens. When his eyes adjusted, he realized the weight he was feeling was the weight of a motionless female body, whose neck had visibly snapped in the fall, and whose abdomen was pierced with a broken metal rod, formerly an overhead handrail. Then he realized the rest of the rod was stuck in his own chest, which was the cause of the sharp pain he was feeling. But the worst was yet to come: not long ago, the body now sprayed on top of him was a smiling blonde mother he had been chatting with.

"Oh, no, Alice…" he heard himself say, his voice full of all the tragedy this entailed. And then: "Oh, God. Rowena? Rowena!" he called and tried to get up, pulling the metal rod out of his chest, looking frantically around in search of the child.

She wasn't far. Her eyes were open, and at first he feared the worst, but then he saw her gaze following him, as he gently rested her mother's body aside and knelt beside her.

"Rowena," he said her name again, urging a response. "Are you hurt? Can you move?"

Her stare met his eyes. "You were both dead," she said feebly, but with conviction he had no power to shake. He might have imagined it, but there was also a trace of accusation in her voice.

"Yes, I'll explain later," he promised.

"Mummy's not coming back, is she?"

He could feel tears forcing their way in his eyes. What are you supposed to say to that? He felt guilty that he was the one who cheated death, while the person that mattered to this little girl, the only person she had in this world, did not have the same luxury.

"Come on, let's get you out of here," he said instead and lifted some chunks of metal so that he could see how bad her injuries actually were. She had some cuts and scratches all over her body, but otherwise nothing seemed to be broken, no internal injuries. He lifted her carefully, looking for a possible head wound, relieved when he found none.

"I don't want to leave mummy!" she cried out in sudden desperation. She must have figured out that once she was carried out of here, she'd never see her mother's face again.

Nikola sat down again and clutched the child against him. He could feel shock disabling his body. He sensed the presence of other mutilated corpses all around them, their little island of life where he hid with his little treasure – a goldilocks whom he hadn't even known an hour ago, and yet who was now connected to him through this horrible act of fate.

And then an idea dawned on him.

"Rowena," he said and sat her down, kneeling in front of her. "I need you to be a brave girl now and wait for me. I'll go get help. I'd ask you to come along, but I know you'd rather be here. It's an unbearable sight for a child to see, I know, but it's what you want and I can't take that away from you. Do you understand me?"

The girl nodded.

"Ok. Hang on, I'll be back soon."

He made his way through the rubble and eventually climbed out into the open. The scene of the crash looked even worse from the outside, with wounded or dead victims being brought out of the fallen train and firemen and medics running around frantically, looking for survivors.

Someone noticed him, but he brushed them off.

"I'm fine," he insisted, and concluding it would be the best he could do, he broke into a run.

Breathless, he reached a telephone box and with a shaking hand inserted several coins in it that he found in his pocket.

"Yes, can I speak to Miss Warren, please? It's urgent," he asked the person who picked up his call.

He had to wait for what seemed like minutes, but what was, in fact, a mere several seconds.

"Hello?"

"Annabelle!" he breathed out. "It's me. Please, tell me you can raise the dead."

"Nikola? What's going on?"

"Can you or can you not?" he insisted.

"Theoretically," she emphasized. "It would depend on the cause of death and the time elapsed since the death… Nikola, what's going on? You seem like you're in shock."

"I've just been in a train crash, Annabelle. There was this woman and a child right next to me; the child is ok, but the mother died in my arms! And the girl is now looking at me like I'm the world's biggest monster, because she saw me come back to life, and I mean she's right, why should I get to live while her mother's dead? She doesn't have anyone else in the world, Annabelle. Tell me you can do something about it. Please…"

"I can be there within half an hour," she estimated, and he breathed out a somewhat relieved thank you. "But Nikola, I can't promise you anything."

He nodded, realising she couldn't see that, of course.

"First car. Please hurry, Annabelle," he urged her with a failing voice and hung up.

Then he hurried back to the site of the crash, and without thinking about it, he barked: "My wife and daughter are still in there!" at the fireman who tried to stop him entering the rubble again. When the fireman insisted that he let the rescue teams deal with it, he simply pushed the man aside (with a force the fireman wasn't expecting) and climbed back inside anyway.

"Rowena! Are you still there?" Nikola called. It was getting dark and he couldn't see whether she was still where he left her. But she was, huddled next to her mother, only lifting her head when she heard the familiar voice.

He grabbed her and pulled her into his arms again.

"Are you an angel, Nik?" she asked before he could voice his thoughts.

"No, darling, no, I'm not an angel. But I'm not human either. God, I wish I didn't have to explain that to you right now, but I have to. I don't know why; I honestly don't know, but it breaks my heart to think this happened to you. I feel connected to you somehow – this happened to us… together… oh, I don't know, do you even understand what I'm trying to say?" he sighed.

"You know me now," she said. "And you care."

"Yes," he jumped at that, "I think that's exactly what I'm saying. And - oh God, I wish you didn't have to go through this, I wish your mummy was all right… I guess what I'm… I mean it's just you now, right?"

She nodded and the pain he felt was more than he could take.

"Ok, I need you to listen to me very carefully now. Here's what you need to know about me: I'm a scientist, just like I said. I've done some horrible things in my life. You could probably say I'm a monster. I was born 94 years ago and I'll never get any older than this. I need you to know all this so that you can decide, ok? I want you to come stay with me. We're in this hell together, and I want to make this right for both of us. If you say yes, I'll take care of you and protect you. I'll show you all the world could be and let you decide what you want to do about it. But I am what I am, and nothing will change me. You should also know that I can be a nasty arrogant pain in your shoe sometimes. And by sometimes I mean most of the time. But I can promise you that I pose no danger to you. And, again, I wish I didn't have to do it all so quickly, because, believe me, darling, I can see how difficult this is for you, but we don't have time. I need you to tell me right now."

She nodded slowly. "Ok."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Like you said, Nik, you care. You will understand about today because you were here with me. And I don't want to go to an orphanage," she burst into tears, and he protectively clutched her tighter.

"No one's taking you to an orphanage, darling. But I need you to help me now, ok? I need to know everything about you so I can convince everyone you are my daughter. Can you do that for me? We need to do that right now, otherwise they could take you away from me, ok? It's just a game for now," he told her. "We'll figure this whole thing out later, I promise."

He was well aware of the strain he was putting on the child, and hated himself for that, but it had to be done. When he was certain he had all angles covered, he stood up and carried her outside to let the medics take her to the hospital.

"Don't leave me, please!" she begged when he explained that he needed to stay behind for a while longer. "Please, come with me, please!"

"Shhhh, darling, don't worry. I will come to you as soon as I can. I need to stay here and help mummy."

"But she's dead," the child protested.

He leaned closer to her and gently explained: "Yes, I know. I need to take care of things, Rowena. But when I do, I'll come straight to the hospital to you. You have nothing to be scared of. Just let them help you. Be brave for your mummy, sweetheart."

When did he even learn to talk like that? It was as if he'd always known, it had always been in him, like it was waiting for this moment, a fixed point in time and space when their paths would cross.

Why did he make her go through that procedure of institutional lies when he was still hoping to resurrect her mother? He told himself it was easier if he pretended to be her real father – to be able to see her in the hospital, to deal with their matters with authority and without unnecessary complications. But he promised a little girl to play a part in her life. He would have to face the consequences no matter how it would all end.

A car stopped at the curb and a woman got out of it, directing her steps immediately towards him. Annabelle.

He led her to Alice, holding the dead mother's hand as his friend examined her.

"This is very nasty, Nikola," Annabelle frowned. "I don't think I can do much here…"

"Could you please just try?" he snapped, berating himself for that instantly.

"Like I said, I will do whatever I can," she assured him kindly. She knelt beside Alice and took the dead woman's other hand in hers while she started singing. In the fading daylight, the world paused to listen to the song, and it brought comfort and alleviated everyone's pain.

Annabelle's free hand rested on Alice's neck, and when she took it away, Nikola could see that the spine had mended itself under her touch. Then she brought her hand down to the wound, which very gradually, unwillingly, sealed itself. But Annabelle shook her head sadly even before her song finished; Alice was gone and there was no way she could bring her back to life.

"I'm so sorry, Nik," she whispered. "I am so, so sorry…"


	3. Chapter 3

The shock dissolved in his body and he started sobbing uncontrollably, taking Alice's hand in both of his and resting it against his forehead. Annabelle moved over to him and encompassed him in her arms, taking care not to break the connection between her friend and the dead woman.

It took about twenty minutes before the sobs subsided and he gradually calmed down. When he did, he kissed Alice's hand, laid it down gently and leaned back against Annabelle for comfort.

"Where's the child?" she whispered a question.

"Hospital. But she should be fine. Physically, at least," he added.

"What will happen to her?"

"I'm taking her in. No chance in hell I'm leaving her, not after this," he shook his head.

"Nik, are you sure about this?" she inquired softly. "If I understand it correctly, you've just met them. And face it, you keep yourself too busy to be a father."

"I thought you, of all people, would understand, Annabelle," he sighed, fearing he lost his permanent supporter for this cause.

"I do, darling, I do understand. I'm just saying it will probably be difficult to get used to," she suggested. "And you're a vampire, Nik, she's going to notice if she stays with you."

"She already has," he reminded her. "She thought I was an angel…" his voice trailed off. "Me, an angel, Annabelle, just imagine that. Such innocence… In any case, I told her. I mean, I didn't tell her exactly what I was, but I told her I was never going to age, I told her I was an arrogant son-of-a-bitch – not in those words," he added when she gave him a surprised look, "and in short, I made sure she knew it wasn't going to be a walk in a park. But we need each other. And she decided to stay with me."

"Ok," she nodded. "I suppose you'll need all the help you can get right now, won't you? I'll get someone to do the necessary paperwork for you, and I suppose you'll want to arrange for the funeral…?"

Nikola nodded, grateful for her offer of a clear-thinking head and lifting some of the responsibilities from her shoulders so that he could concentrate on other things.

"I'll get another someone to do that. Come on, let's get your friend out of here, and I'll drive you to the hospital afterwards, ok?"

"I love you, Annabelle," he professed.

"You love a lot of people, Nik. Not quite the bad guy some people would peg you for," she gave him a hint of a smile.

They got up, Nikola took Alice's body in his arms and they climbed out of the wreckage once more. There was a stretch of grass where the victims were being gathered, so they made for it and a medic directed them to a space where they could lay Alice down next to the other bodies.

"Alice Attenborough, born March 30th, 1923, Cambridge, England," Nikola replied automatically to another medic asking him for her details.

Annabelle called her people and they got busy with all the arrangements immediately, leaving her and Nikola free to go to the hospital to see how Rowena was doing.

"Hello, I'm Nikola Tesla; they brought my daughter here after the train crash…?" he said to the receptionist. "How is she?" he shot before the woman at the counter even had a chance to affirm Rowena's presence at the hospital.

"Sedated. She broke down after she got here, poor thing," the receptionist said with a hint of accusation in her voice. "She was calling you all the time."

"Oh God," Nikola rubbed his face with his palms.

"Well, she's in room five, second floor," the receptionist offered slightly sourly, which earned her a hating look from Annabelle, as she took Nikola by the shoulder and led him upstairs.

Before they could enter Rowena's room, they were stopped by a doctor, who was able to tell them more about Rowena's condition. Nikola's assumptions had been right – there were just bruises and lacerations, no internal injuries, but, as was to be expected, she was also in huge shock. The doctor explained they had to give her sedatives to calm her after her breakdown at arrival, nevertheless the dose wasn't heavy, and he believed that if they found Rowena awake, they should be able to take her home. The familiar environment would probably help her recover more quickly.

Annabelle let Nikola enter the room on his own. He found Rowena just waking up, but she sat up abruptly when she saw him come in.

"Nik!"

He sat down beside her and gave her a hug. "Hello, sweetheart."

"Did they tell you I cried?" she asked, her voice somewhat worried and even more so when Nikola nodded.

"I'm sorry, Nik. I know I promised I'd be brave…"

He could almost feel tears in his eyes. "Don't, sweetie. It's not your fault. It's ok. I've come to take you home with me," he changed the subject.

"Can we go now?" she asked eagerly, and Nikola concluded that the doctor must have been right about her being more comfortable in a familiar environment. Still, he wasn't really taking her home – he was taking her to another new place, a strange place that would definitely take some time to get used to.

"I meant my home, darling. Are you sure you're up for it? It's a long way away…" he warned her, suddenly realising what that meant. A train ride. Oh, hell. He'll have to ask Annabelle to drive them and stay over – if she's willing to do that for him.

"How far?" she studied his face and the short frowning moment of hesitation didn't escape her.

"About three hours. My friend has a car, she can drive us there. We'll just have to stop over at your place to get you some clothes, and whatever else you'll want to take with you, ok? Are you up for it? We can always do it tomorrow, you know, you can get some good rest now…"

"No," she shook her head resolutely. "I want to go now. Please."

"Ok," he agreed. "Let's go."


	4. Chapter 4

Rowena fell asleep an hour into the journey to Nikola's home in Galena. Annabelle turned off the radio, and for a while, they drove silence, until she spontaneously started singing Amazing Grace in a soft, hushed voice. Nikola joined her around "I once was lost", creating a harmony line for her, while holding his daughter in his arms, wrapped in a woolen blanket. The singing didn't seem to wake her up, but even in sleep, she seemed more relaxed at the sound of Annabelle's performance.

And thus they drove along a darkened empty road, their souls damaged, nevertheless finding comfort in the melody and the calm melancholia it brought about.

"Well, a little Christian for my taste," Nikola professed when they finished, "but I do like the tune."

Annabelle risked a smile, and after another while of silence, she said: "Listen, Nik…"

"Hm?"

"How come you're so taken by these girls? Women? What should I call them in this case?" she wondered.

"Don't worry about it, Annabelle," he shut her up. "I don't know, they just both have – had – this aura around them, it was like they were two little sunshines. I just immediately felt good in their company. God, she was just twenty-seven," he sighed afterwards, remembering the sunshine that was Alice.

"You really had a crush on her, didn't you?" Annabelle guessed and earned a reproachful look from Nikola, who made a silent gesture reminding her of the little girl in his arms. But there was no point defying Annabelle and her "so what" attitude, and Nikola realised this very quickly. After all, even if Rowena was just resting her eyes and not actually sleeping, he wasn't going to say anything bad about her mother. Only good things. It was heart-warming to realise that. There was nothing bad he could say about Alice.

"I think I was about two minutes away from asking her out," he confessed quietly.

"I'm sorry. But you know it would never have worked, right? You'd have to tell her what you are, Nik, and you wouldn't age."

"Yeah, I know. It's just that this brought about a phase I have at times – when my work doesn't seem as fulfilling as it used to. I feel like I need more, some sort of life, a different kind of happiness…"

"Well, you have a daughter now, Nik."

"Yes, I do," he smiled endearingly at the child in his arms. "And I'm terribly scared, Annabelle. I have no idea how to do this. Still, there's nothing else I want to do. Like I said, we need each other."

"You'll do just fine. I honestly believe that," she added before he could voice his doubt and object that "she was just saying that". "And you know I'm here to help you whenever you need me, right? One of the perks of living alone," she smiled bitterly.

"Thanks, Annabelle. You're a true friend."

"Well, you did save my life the day you met me. If that's not a proof of a good heart, Nik, then I don't know what is."

He gave her a short laugh in response, although there was no humour in it.

They chatted idly for another hour before Annabelle turned off the road onto a dirt track leading into the depths of the woods. She had nagged Nikola to invest into an asphalt road for ages, but he had always retorted that he didn't need construction workers snooping around his home. He'd had bad experience with those who helped restore his house as it was.

The uneven surface of the track shook Rowena from her sleep, and she sat up on the seat, squinting into the darkness outside, trying to figure out where on earth they were.

"Hey, sweetheart," Nikola greeted her. "We're almost there. Just another couple of minutes."

"But this is a _forest_, Nik," she protested, and a gush of fear flowed through her body. What if she had been mistaken in that she could trust him?

"Yes, I know. But don't worry, it gets better," he gave her an encouraging smile and, as a proof of his words, they just drove into a clearing, revealing a magnificent mansion in front of them.

Rowena's eyes widened in awe.

"This is where you live…?" she asked, surprise getting the better of her.

"Yes, it is," he nodded with a smile.

Annabelle parked on a driveway in front of the main entrance. Nikola helped his little girl out of the car and headed to the car's trunk to get the two suitcases of her possessions. It wasn't much, considering her whole life was packed in them.

He had been both heart-broken and greatly impressed when he saw the conditions Alice and Rowena had been living in. Their rented apartment was tiny and deprived of all luxury - and yet they were happy. They made do with what little they had and with each other. Alice's made-up stories substituted fairy-tale books, prop-less, mostly word games for toys, clothes were mended over and over again. It stroke Nikola back then that there must, in fact, be an awful lot of families living like that. There had always been families like that, plus a world war had just ended. He wondered how they had lived in England and whether it was worth it to come over the ocean. He found himself urged to shower the child with everything she could wish for, but instinctively dismissed the thought immediately. She was too good to be spoiled like that. Still, he made a promise to give her whatever she should need, in both material and non-material sense.

He gave his keys to Annabelle, who went ahead to open the entrance door for them, and took the suitcases, gesturing Rowena to come along inside.

She gazed incredulously at the spacious hall and the intricately carved wooden staircase.

"Welcome to our new home," Nikola's warm voice reached her ears.


	5. Chapter 5

"Annabelle, I'm sure you can find your way to the guest room?" Nikola turned to his friend. "You must be exhausted."

"Actually, could I have a cup of tea first?" she asked, and Nikola immediately nodded: "Sure, please, help yourself," he gestured her towards the kitchen. "Now you, Rowena, come with me upstairs, I'll show you where you'll sleep for the moment."

"For the moment?" her eyes widened as fear crept into them again.

"Oh, no," Nikola rushed to correct his mistake, cursing himself for alarming her, "don't worry, darling, I'm not giving you up. But… you know what? Just come with me, I'll show you what the problem is," he winked at her cheerfully, and she hesitantly followed him upstairs. He led her to a magnificent bedroom, furnished with impeccable taste, and deposited her suitcases on the beautiful silk oriental carpet.

"Now this is my room," he explained. "I don't sleep much, so you can have it until you get your own. Come," he returned to the landing and gestured to a door in the perpendicular wall. He went to open it, and again, she followed.

The room behind the door was less spacious than Nikola's bedroom, but still impressively huge. However, it was also bare except some boxes piled in the corner. The plaster on the walls was stained and peeling at places and the floor was covered with ugly linoleum which had caught too much dust throughout the years, thus losing its original colour in favour of the dismal greyish yellow it was now.

"Oh my gosh, that's almost bigger than our entire apartment!" Rowena observed.

"Do you like the space?" Nikola inquired. "I mean don't look at the present state of it, everything will be fixed for you."

"Even the fireplace?"

"If you promise to be very, very careful."

"Oh, I do promise! It would be so amazing to have a room with a real fireplace. Oh, please, Nik, I'll be careful!"

He couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm.

"You will always put the fire out if you leave the room for a longer period of time, understand? Like for school and for meals. And you will put it out before you go to sleep, ok? There's central heating in this house, you won't be cold in any case," he set the rules strictly, but not unkindly. He was going to reason with the girl as far as it would be possible – and he sensed this would get him far with Rowena.

Indeed, she nodded, still not believing her luck.

"You're so kind to me, Nik," she voiced her gratitude.

"Why would I be anything else, little one?" he smiled sadly at her, his expression making her pause and become serious again. "Anyway," he recovered, "how are you feeling? Are you hungry, thirsty? Or do you want to go straight to bed?"

"I'm not really sleepy," she shrugged apologetically, realising this was what was expected of little girls at one in the morning. "A bit hungry," she searched her body for signs.

"Ok, we'll go downstairs and see what we can do about that," he offered.

"Thank you."

He knelt in front of her and took her by the shoulders. "Darling, this is something you can always take for granted and not thank me for, ok? Besides, it won't be much of a feast; I only have the few things we bought in the afternoon. I – don't really eat that much either."

She looked straight in his eyes, a piercing look demanding a truthful answer.

"What are you, Nik?"

"Ok," he resigned softly. "But please don't panic. You know I told you I was a monster, but I wouldn't hurt you."

"Nik," she said impatiently.

"Ok. I'm a vampire."

"Vampire," she repeated pensively. "But you're not evil; Annabelle said you had a good heart. You save lives, you don't take them. How do you feed? Do you steal blood from hospitals?"

"No," Nikola shook his head, perplexed by her calm reasoning, and shocked that she had heard them talk. Had she also heard what he had said about Alice? "I have a herd of cows, actually."

"I trust you," she nodded seriously. "I really do. You've been very nice to me from the beginning, and your close friend says you're a good person, so it must be true, right? She thought I was asleep, she wasn't saying that to deceive me, was she?"

"You know what, darling? Now that I think about it, I'm sure she knew you weren't asleep. But it wasn't you she was setting up, it was me," he sighed. "I should have known better."

"I'm glad you liked my mum, though."

"I'm glad to hear that. I was afraid you'd think I'm cheeky."

"It wasn't difficult to like my mum, Nik," she said seriously, making him wonder if she really was only eight years old. She was a child, of course, and very vulnerable at points, but the way she spoke sometimes suggested a latent grown-up in her, someone who had seen the world at its worst before she was allowed to fully appreciate its beauty. It had taken away her father before she was two, so her memories of him were so vague they were virtually non-existent, and now her only other relative, one she'd got so firmly attached to, was dead as well.

And here she was: an eight-year-old orphan with only a vampire and a siren to look after her. Still, she embraced her new life, already feeling better thanks to Annabelle's song in the car, somehow at peace and safe now that she knew exactly what she had consented to. There was no other place she would rather be in the circumstances.

She put her arms around Nikola's neck and gave him an affectionate hug. "Can we go now?" she asked. "I'm really hungry now."

Nikola laughed in spite of himself and got up from the bricked floor, taking Rowena by the hand.

"Of course we can," he said and led her downstairs.

"What is this place, anyway? It looks like a hospital," she pointed out as they descended the stairs. "I mean, like it used to be a hospital."

Nikola nodded. "That's right. It used to be. There's still an inscription above the front door, which you will notice when there's light outside."

"Will do," she promised.


	6. Chapter 6

Annabelle met them at the bottom of the stairs.

"Oh, there you are. I knew you would be hungry. Made you some bread with cheese, Rowena. And poured you a glass, Nik, God knows you need one," she surprised them by her thoughtfulness.

"There isn't a God in this world who would be as omniscient as you are, dear friend," Nikola retorted, but his usual playfulness in dealing with Annabelle hadn't returned yet.

"I'm guessing that would be the cow's blood, then?" asked Rowena.

"You told her?" Annabelle looked impressed. "And you're not scared, little one?"

"He could have killed me a million times if he was planning to," Rowena shrugged. "What I would like to know is: what are you, Annabelle?"

"O-K," Annabelle bit her lips, realising this called for a peaceful sit down, which she immediately suggested, and the others agreed. They settled in the living room, Rowena with her late supper and Nikola with his glass of blood derivate, while Annabelle joined them just like that, having had deposited her empty cup into the sink already.

"Right," Rowena started boldly. "Answer me this, you two. You, Nik, said you were going to get help when you left me in the train wreck with mummy. But you came back all alone – and then you just carried me out and sent me off to hospital. Which was a little weird, and it got even weirder when I realised you had gone out to call Annabelle here. But then you sang that song in the car and it made me feel so much better! So I thought, if you can do this, what else can you do? Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to ask is: did you try to bring my mum back to life?"

Neither of the partners in crime could find the words to speak. They never thought she would figure it out so soon. Maybe later, when the wound wasn't so fresh anymore, but right now…

"Yes, we did," Nikola whispered eventually, and when the girl's eyes filled with tears, his followed their lead.

"But it didn't work…?"

"I'm sorry, darling," Nikola shook his head. "It was too late, and she was too badly injured…"

"I promise you I did everything I could," said Annabelle sadly and her expression pleaded for forgiveness.

"I didn't want to… not try it," Nikola explained. "It just seemed so unfair that I could cheat death, but your mum couldn't, while she was everything you had and I was a mere stranger… I wanted your mum to have the same chance as I had."

They sat in silence for a while, Annabelle and Nikola waiting anxiously for the child to absorb the information and decide how she felt about it.

"Thanks for not giving me false hope, Nik," she whispered eventually. "And thanks for trying to save my mum."

Nikola stared into the carpet, not wanting to repeat himself and tell her how sorry he was that it didn't work out. No need to bring that up again.

"Anyway, Annabelle, you never told me what kind of a being you are…" Rowena picked up where they left off in the hallway.

Annabelle sighed. "Well, that's a bit difficult to explain. I'm a healer. And when sing or dance, you can't help but listen or watch. Nik here calls me a Siren, but it's more because we haven't found a better word yet."

"What about angel of mercy?"

Annabelle smiled sadly. "I could be that. But you might have noticed we're not particularly religious."

"That's ok. I don't feel like ever praying again myself," Rowena shrugged.

"We can have that talk later," Nikola promised softly. "As usual, I will tell you what I know and leave you to decide, ok? But it's too late for that tonight. And you've got a lot on your plate already."

"Ok, but I don't think I'll change my mind," shrugged the girl.

"Eat up, Winny," Annabelle advised. "It's late and you should try to get some sleep."

Rowena nodded and chewed hurriedly.

Annabelle retired to the guest bedroom soon and Nikola and Rowena followed. The girl still didn't feel very sleepy, so Nikola sent her to get a proper bath, and afterwards tugged her in his bed, lying down beside her on the covers.

"I'll stay with you tonight. In case you have bad dreams. Or you can't sleep," he offered, for which she was immensely grateful. They settled face to face, Nikola's right hand gently holding her left, and they talked quietly.

"Listen, what would you like your room to look like?"

"You'll let me have a say?" she asked, amazed.

"It's going to be your room; you should feel comfortable in it. But it shouldn't be anything too wild, you might regret it later. What colours would you like there?"

"Well, I always dreamt of my own room that would be in a very warm shade of pink. You know, not bubble gum pink or anything, but deep pink. Something like red wine, only… well, pink."

"I think I could allow that," Nikola smiled. "Any other?"

"Oh, I really like warm colours. I mean I like most colours, but the warm ones are just so beautiful. They make me feel shiny and safe. I think it would be beautiful to have this warm dark pink and some shades of golden, and furniture from dark brown wood that would look like mead when the sun would shine on it. And it would be so wonderful to have a carpet on the floor! But that would be very expensive, wouldn't it? It's a huge room and everything…" she looked a slightly fearful when she voiced her worries, remembering that just maybe she got carried away by her dream and overstepped a line. She couldn't make excessive demands on her benefactor, could she? He was too kind to take her in as it was.

"I won't give you every single thing you want, Win. You are a wonderful little person and I really don't want to spoil you. That said, wanting a carpet in your room and telling me your favourite colour combinations is something so basic that…" he shook his head in disbelief. "You know what, Win, any reasonable wish you have, I'll grant it, ok?"

"You do have a kind heart, Nik."

"Tell me what else you were dreaming of," he invited her.

"I always wanted many books in my room. And a rocking chair or an armchair I could snuggle in and read them on rainy or winter days… And a big table I could use for writing and drawing. Not that I'm good at it, but I like doing it," she smiled coyly. "Am I getting too unreasonable?"

"No," he shook his head. "I'll see what I can do about those things. Go on."

"You are spoiling me, Nik. You are spoiling me a lot," Rowena refused his offer.

"Right. Let me put it this way: you have just become the lady of this house. That means you have some obligations, and one of them will be to represent your house duly. I'm afraid your current wardrobe won't do anymore…"

"…but Nik…" she protested.

"Don't worry, I won't dress you up like a princess and show you off like an animal in the zoo. But you do need good clothes and shoes; otherwise people would think I'm an evil stepfather who keeps all the wealth to himself and has you for some kind of Cinderella. So, can you do it for me? I don't want them to think I'm that evil," he winked at her.

"Ok, but like you said, nothing snobbish. I don't want to be that," she pleaded.

"Oh, I love your mother," Nikola wanted to say, but thought better of it. Instead, he went on with the planning: "Don't worry, Annabelle is more than apt in fashion matters, she'll help you get everything you need. Now, is there anything else you'd like in your room?"

"You know, I always wanted to have a pendulum clock."

"That might be too loud when you want to sleep. But we'll see about that."

"What about a mirror?"

"That would definitely look good in there. Pictures?"

"Erm… could I maybe have one of my mummy there?"

"Of course, darling. I'll do whatever I can to get you one. Maybe you could give me one of the photos you took from home and I could have it painted on a big canvas so you have a big portrait of her?" he suggested.

"I would love that. By the way, Nik, who's the beautiful lady in the pictures here?" she side-stepped from the topic, and was almost sorry she had when Nikola sighed heavily.

"That's Helen," he said, but could not bring himself to give her a more detailed explanation.

"Was she your wife?" Rowena asked carefully.

"No," he shook his head, "no. She is, however, the love of my life. But… it's complicated."

"You couldn't be together?"

"Maybe we could have been. But I was always scared that she didn't feel the same way about me as I did about her, so I never even told her. We were good friends, back in the old days, but I haven't seen her in seven years and… maybe we will spend the rest of eternity apart."

"She's immortal too?"

"No. But she was given a gift of a very long life."

"You know, one day that friendship you've had will have become too deeply rooted for either of you to want anyone else in your lives," she said seriously.

"Who are you and what have you done to my little girl?" Nikola wondered.

"What I mean is one day you will wake up and realise there's a completely different world out there, and you'll want someone from the world that you remember to stand beside you. It makes sense, doesn't it? Everyone else from your age – I mean from when you grew up – will be gone. There will just be the two of you. No, I know, there are probably other old beings out there, but you are good friends, so time will definitely bind you even closer, won't it?" she reasoned, which made Nikola even more dumbfounded than he already was.

"Have you always been like this?"

"I read a lot," Rowena shrugged.

"I suppose that's a good thing," he smiled eventually.

"How old is Annabelle? Is she as old as you?"

"No, she's way older. She remembers BCE."

"Oh. That was a long time ago."

"Like I said."

"How long have you known each other?"

"Almost sixty years."

"Nik… how come you can come out in daylight?"

"That's easy. Most things you've ever heard about vampires are pure myth."

"Which ones?"

"Well, we can obviously go about in the daylight, as you have observed, you can't kill us by stakes or garlic or holy water or silver bullets, nor are we scared of crosses. Blood is a necessary thing, but we can also eat and drink apart from that."

"But you don't have to…?"

"No," he shook his head. "I don't eat much, as you might have guessed, but I love my wine and occasionally take a bite of something, too."

"And how does a person become a vampire?"

"Well, that's complicated. I became one because I had a vampire part in me already. We experimented with some ancient vampire blood we had found – and by we I mean Helen, myself and some other colleagues from the Oxford University – and developed this special serum. We used it on ourselves and each of us got a different gift. Helen got her long life and I found out what I really am."

"And by Oxford University you mean…"

"… the one in England, yes."

"But you don't sound English."

"I'm not. I was born in what is Yugoslavia today."

"That must have been a long journey here…" she remarked.

"Yes, it most certainly was," Nikola agreed. "Oh, by the way, do you mind that I call you Win? I can't seem to be able to shorten your name any other way. Ro seems too wrong…"

"Yes, Win is ok," she nodded and tried closing her eyes, to no avail. "What do people do when they can't sleep?"

"I thought you'd know."

"Well, fairy-tales help. Or lullabies. You just don't strike me as someone who'd read or sing to me. Not that the singing in the car wasn't very nice."

"I can tell you a story," Nikola said somewhat indignantly, not wanting to be blamed for being child-unfriendly. "Settle down comfortably and listen…"

He told her a fairy-tale half remembered, half made up, about princesses and dragons and brave knights who were always there to save the day. He would add several twists for her amusement as well as just to talk longer and have a greater chance of her falling asleep. His voice fell like a caress and Rowena soon let go of everything that was keeping her awake.

She finally fell asleep at 2:40 a.m.


	7. Chapter 7

It was around half past seven when Annabelle opened her eyes, only to find Nikola sitting on a chair he had pulled up to her bed, patiently waiting for her to wake up.

"What gives, vampire boy?" she asked with genuine concern.

"You'd never believe what she said to me," he started in a tone bordering on a child ramble. "She sees the photos of Helen on my bedside tables, and she asks if she was my wife."

"But that's sort of logical, isn't it?" Annabelle asked carefully.

"Well, yes, but I told her the truth and then she says 'one day you will wake up and find out you're the only people from your age left and you'll be compelled to be together' or something in that sense. Is that what kids are really like today?"

"She's certainly very perceptive," Annabelle agreed.

"That she is. And she shows incredible level of understanding and reason. You explain things to her, she thinks about them for a moment and then she nods and she's ok with everything. I mean is that normal?"

"For a child of that age? It happens. If you're sensitive and you think and things happen to you," she shrugged.

"Yeah, I guess."

"You're not scared of her, are you?"

"No, no way! I absolutely adore her. She's really special."

"I think she'll do you a lot of good."

Nikola just nodded thoughtfully.

"She mentioned you last time I saw her," Annabelle said after a minute of silence. From the change in her voice Nikola knew exactly whom she was talking about.

"Good or bad sense?"

"Relatively good."

"Well… that's… good. I guess."

Annabelle knew she wouldn't get anything else from him at that particular moment, so she returned to the topic closer at hand:

"Rowena?"

"She's had a rough night. Woke up crying after four and it took a while to calm her down again. Best if we let her sleep."

"Poor child," said Annabelle and they both sighed independently of each other.

Rowena woke up and nearly panicked when she saw the time on the clock on the wall – shortly after noon. She shot out of bed, determined to get dressed as quickly as possible, however, then her sight fell out of the window and dived straight into the magical scenery of the bright October sun sending its rays through the dense fog and the canopies of an old neglected orchard. Beyond, at the foot of the gentle slope she could distinguish the roofs of farm buildings, whose inhabitants, she guessed, took care of Nik's cows. She stood there, enchanted, for several minutes before she snapped out of the reverie and remembered she should be… well, somewhere and most definitely up and about.

She found some clothes in her suitcases and ran downstairs, meeting a lovely smell of cooking as soon as she opened the bedroom door.

The kitchen offered a rather cosy scene of Annabelle busy at the stove and Nik sitting at the table with a glass of white wine. Pleasant music was streaming from a radio on a cupboard.

"Erm… hello," she greeted them timidly.

"Morning, sunshine," Annabelle smiled at her and Nikola copied her expression, uttering a gentle hello back.

"I'm so sorry I slept so long," Rowena apologised.

"Well, you had a rough night," Nikola suggested. "But you will have a very strict daily routine here, young lady," he warned her in mock sternness and sighed when Rowena hung down her head and nodded.

"Darling, I'm disappointed," he said. "You really thought I would be so nasty to you right from the beginning? I'm not a stuck-up benefactor from a 19th century novel. Of course, I will be glad if you adhere to a certain routine, but I won't be mean about it."

"So you're just a stuck-up 19th century inventor?" Annabelle chipped in and Nikola gave a short laugh.

"Yes, exactly," he agreed.

"You are two insane creatures, you know that?"

"But you love us all the same, don't you?" Nikola grinned at her victoriously.

"What happened to my mother, Nik?" she broke the mood and both Nikola and Annabelle's faces switched to dead serious in microseconds.

"I meant to talk to you about it. Are you sure you want to discuss it now, though? You've just woken up."

"I can take it when I'm awake," she assured him.

"Ok," he nodded softly. "Sit down, please."

She obeyed and he went on carefully but decisively: "Your mother is in the city morgue in Chicago as of now. I haven't started arranging the funeral yet, because I want you to tell me how you want this to be done. Do you want her to be buried here; or in Chicago; or maybe Letchworth? And do you want her cremated or buried in the ground?"

"She wanted to be cremated. She told me once she would've hated to be buried in the ground and rot. And I want her close to me, so… can we bury her here?"

"Ok. I'll call my people and arrange everything. I suppose she would have wanted a priest…?"

"I guess," Rowena frowned.

"If you don't want to hear anything about God, Win, do you still believe you'll meet your mum again one day?" Annabelle interluded.

"I don't know what to believe. If you know what happens after death, tell me."

"Question is whether it is about the truth or about the simple fact that you believe in something better," Nikola suggested.

"If you believe in something that is not real, you're just stupid," Rowena stated mercilessly.

"I think that's just the grief talking," Nikola guessed. "I don't mean to say you're wrong, but it's definitely not the time to discuss this yet," he added, more directed at Annabelle than the girl.

"You're right," said Annabelle. "Sorry for bringing that up."

"Ok. If you don't want to talk about that, what about my school?"

"Oh. I'm afraid Chicago's a bit far to commute. Did you have many friends there?"

Rowena shrugged. "A few. I got along with everyone, though. But I know it would be impossible to stay at my old school, don't worry."

"You can keep in touch with them," Annabelle assured her.

"Can I invite them over for a weekend sometime?" Rowena asked, expecting a negative answer all the same. You lived in houses like this one to keep away from people.

"The basement and my laboratory on the first floor are strictly out of bounds. I mean it. But otherwise, yes, why not," Nikola shrugged and earned amazed looks from both of his female companions. "I want to do this right," he added by means of explanation. "I want my foster daughter to have a proper social life. I told you I would show you the world, Rowena, not isolate you from it."

The girl tilted her head to the side, analyzing for a fragment of a second before she jumped up, threw herself into his arms and planted a kiss on his cheek.

"Thank you, Nik!"

"Thank me when you've grown up a decent citizen of the world," he smiled.

"Nik?"

"What, darling?"

"What's in the basement?"

"Most of my electronic inventions. Come, I'll show you so that Annabelle can finish cooking in peace," Nikola stood up and took her by the shoulders to lead her downstairs.

"But I can't come in there on my own?" Rowena guessed as they descended the staircase.

"Of course you can. You live here. I'll be happy if you take interest in my work. All I'm asking is that you don't meddle with machines you don't know how to operate, ok? I'll teach you how some of them work, but it will take some time."

"But I can come take a look at them any time, right?" she asked and Nikola simply nodded.

"You know what I like about you?" he said later. "You understand everything. I just explain why I want you to do or not to do things and you just… understand."

"It's how I was raised," she shrugged.

"No," he shook his head. "You have to have predispositions for that."

"One thing I don't understand…"

"And that is…?"

"What's a pre-whatsit?"

He laughed. "Predisposition. It means that it's already in you when you're born."

"Why didn't you say so in the first place?"

"Hey, sweetheart, you've signed up for a life with a scientist, better get used to that," Nikola warned her playfully. "Besides, I'm sure you can handle it."

"Can't wait," she gave him a fleeting smile before her eyes widened as he turned on the light in the basement and she came face to face with machinery she had never seen before in her life. Of course, that wasn't saying much, because no one in the world had seen the like of these electronic devices. But she decided that if Nik said she could handle it, she was going to prove him right.


	8. Chapter 8

"They said you were a virgin father. What does that even mean?"

This was the first sentence Rowena uttered when Nikola came to pick her up from school on her premiere day there. He opened the car door for her and walked over to his side slowly, uttering a resigned "kids these days…" before sitting down behind the wheel.

"Well, I guess you know Virgin Mary, right? I think that's what they meant, that I'm like her – getting a child without ever having been with a woman."

"I suppose this being with a woman means something different than just spending time with her, like you're doing with Annabelle, right?"

"I'm not sure I'm ready to have that talk with you, Win," Nikola sighed.

"What talk?"

"About what it takes to make a child."

"Two people loving each other?"

"That too."

"Nik," she urged him impatiently. "Obviously my classmates know. I don't want to feel like I'm the only one not getting the joke. I've been through air raids when I was a baby. Do you really think there's something left that I can't take?"

"Ok," he gave up. "Let's say you have an electric socket and plug. You insert the plug into the socket, they connect and electricity can flow to the device on the other side of the cable and make it work, right? There's this connection and something is produced."

She nodded to let him know she understood his meaning.

"And men and women are exactly like the plug and the socket. They have parts which fit together, and if they connect, a child might be created. Well, that's the biological part of it, anyway."

She didn't reply to that. She sat beside him and a dreamy smile played on her lips.

"Win?"

She looked up at him and her smile gained more radiance for an instant. "I was just thinking it's kind of beautiful, isn't it? I mean if you're connected like that, I guess you do become one with the one you love, don't you?"

"In a way, yes," he concurred.

"And you've never done that…?"

"No," he shook his head. "I've dedicated my life to science. And it's better, seeing as I can't be with the woman I love," he shrugged.

"Is she really worth it?"

"Trust me, she is," Nikola replied with conviction.

"Ok."

Her subsequent frown and shaking her head made him ask indignantly: "What?"

"I was just thinking that mum was lucky that she didn't get to start a relationship with you. Would you have really put her through this? Living in a shadow of some other lady she could never compete with, because you'd never even give her a chance?"

Nikola sighed. "You're right. I guess I never thought of that. In fairness to me, I only had eighteen minutes, so there wasn't enough time to think of every aspect of it."

"But you wanted to ask her out anyway."

"Well, maybe I did want to give her a chance."

"What, as in you being some sort of a super-man women should compete over?"

"No, I didn't mean it like that! What's wrong with you?"

"I don't know, Nik. I'm sorry. I guess it's just the idea that my father died as a hero in the war and now everyone thinks you grew me in a lab," she frowned.

"I can see how that can be upsetting," Nikola affirmed. "Do you want me to haunt them for you? I can be quite scary if I want to."

"No. This is the one and only time I let it get to me like this. I've lived through air raids, I've lost both of my parents in a horrible way and now I live in a spooky mansion with a genius vampire. I have no idea how my pathetic sneering classmates could top that," she said decisively.

"Is that a bad thing, living in a spooky mansion with a genius vampire?" Nikola asked, rather than telling her he was both impressed and terrified by what she just said to him.

"No, it's wicked. But it might scare some people. You know, people who don't know any better," she suggested.

"I guess," Nikola nodded.

Silly jokes apart, it could be said that Rowena was settling well into the new life in Galena. The hardest experience so far was, predictably, her mother's funeral the previous week, but apart from these few hours of unmitigated grief, the girl was coping with exceptional lack of difficulties. Nikola and Annabelle were worried about this: on one hand they were glad that Rowena didn't look to be in as much pain as they had suspected she would be, but on the other, they feared that if she didn't take the time to express her pain now, it would hit her much harder later on. The danger of that was there was no way of telling exactly when it would hit her.

"There has been enough pain. I miss her, I do, but I can't cry anymore. Honestly, there's nothing I can do," she would explain when they confronted her about it cautiously. "I feel empty, that's all."

Upon which they promised to listen if the blow ever came, and offered a shoulder to cry on. Rowena nodded seriously, thanked them – and that was the end of it.

Then came her first day at school and she later revealed she had been well received by most of her classmates, even though some were just curious about the "spooky mansion and its mysterious inhabitant". Nevertheless, the overall impression was that of success, especially if one considered how cruel children can sometimes be.

Apart from school friends, Rowena had also made friends with Nikola's tenants' boys, Ralf and Roger. Ralf was only in the first grade, while Roger and Win went to the same class, although he was almost a year older than she was. In any case, the three of them formed something of a gang to run around Nikola's wooded grounds, playing games and climbing trees.

And then, when she wasn't out, Nikola would introduce her to the exciting world of electricity and his inventions. She was bright, albeit far from genius, but Nikola was confident that given time and a lot of explanation via metaphors, she would understand everything he tried to show her. His enthusiasm was slightly curbed when her practical mind came forward to blight his dreams of a spectacular future including a Nobel Prize:

"What do you want for Christmas?" he asked her one day. Without a moment of hesitation, she replied: "Build me a microwave oven."


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks to Chartreuseian for correcting this :) And to everyone for support ;)  
><strong>**LOVE all reviews, even though I'm not able to reply to all of them atm; sorry!**

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><p>Nikola did manage to build Win a microwave oven, even managed to size it down for her so that it didn't take up much space in the kitchen. In a couple of weeks, Rowena felt completely at home in Nikola's mansion and in his kitchen especially. At first she would get help from Annabelle or Sarah, the tenant farmer's wife, but she soon acquired her own style and became so proficient that even Nikola was sometimes drawn from his lab to the delicious smell of her cooking and took dinner with her.<p>

He gradually became aware that his foster daughter had been raised to participate in household running as much as would be safe for her without getting her grades down. It was a relief, to know that she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself, while he spent most of his days working. They always spent evenings together, though. They'd begin by Nikola checking Win's homework, explaining things she didn't quite catch at school, and when they finished that, they would talk. It wasn't long before Nikola found he'd shared the entire Helen story with Rowena, their past adventures, and a fair share of his lone travels.

"Can we do that?" she wondered. "Travel, I mean. It doesn't have to be dangerous, but I'd love to see the world so much!"

"Don't worry, darling, we'll travel more than you'll like," he winked at her. "And you'll have to take up some foreign languages, of course."

"Sounds like fun," she beamed at him.

"I'm glad you're striving to be an educated young lady."

"What else would you want me to be? Stupid? There are so many stupid kids at school, I'd hate to be like them," she shuddered. "I mean they don't even care to know anything. They say they won't ever need it."

"And that's what makes you special – wanting to know."

She shook her head. "I know I'm not a genius like you, Nik. But I still want to know things. But you know what's worst?"

"Tell me."

"You're not supposed to ask for more at school. You're not allowed to ask the really deep questions, the ones you really care about. It's not 'appropriate'. And, of course, I'm not allowed to say some things I believe in. I hate that."

"It will all change one day, darling. I promise you."

"When I'm seventy?" she sneered sarcastically.

"Oh, seventy's barely any age," he waved his hand.

"Hello, not a vampire."

"Would you like to be?" slipped his tongue before he had a chance to properly think about it. It just suddenly occurred to him to ask.

"Nik, you don't even know how to make other vampires," she reminded him coolly.

"True. But hypothetically?"

"What's hypothetically?"

"That means it's not for real. It's like 'let's say…'"

"Hm…" she thought, "to live forever, save an insane amount of money on food, which I would have to spend on refining animal blood so that it would taste good? And watching everyone I know die out gradually till there's no one left? It's terrifying, Nik, to tell you the truth."

"You're not looking at it right. There are so many magnificent things that being a vampire brings you and allows you to do…"

And so he spent the rest of the evening advocating being a vampire. He told the girl of their glorious legacy and of the golden age the Earth saw when vampires ruled over people, but in the end he had to admit defeat when he realized she wasn't impressed. She loved the idea of knowledge and culture and a great civilisation, however, she insisted that it be accompanied by democracy and by equality of all parties concerned. He didn't believe in that, at least not entirely – some people were just too idiotic to be left in charge – but he chose not to argue with her about it. It was nice that she had faith in people, that she still maintained something that was child-like, despite the horrors she had lived through. She never regained her trust in God, so it was probably beneficial that she still believed in something. He had no idea this was largely thanks to his great, selfless act of taking her in and taking the best care of her she had ever wished for. He let her have her own mind and just gave her all the information she needed to make it up. And on top of that, he let her "design" her room almost entirely on her own.

He and Annabelle brought her catalogues and went through them with her and guiding her where she needed. They had to explain that her room was on the east side of the house (although it also had some windows to the north and south), so it would get limited light during the day. Light, they pointed out, was very beneficial to one's mind, which was why it would be wise not to choose too many dark colours and make the room even more obscure. Rowena succumbed to their logic without protest, but didn't entirely give up her original idea for colour combinations. They ended up choosing warm, dark magenta wallpapers with golden floral pattern, chocolate-brown ebony furniture and curtains and carpet in light shades of gold. Rowena even got a beautiful Victorian rocking chair and her desired huge desk, which sat in the corner between one of the eastern and the southern window.

Nikola generously allowed as many workers as were needed to work on the room, so it was finished about a month after Rowena's arrival, and she excitedly moved in one Saturday, taking with her all the new things Nik and Annabelle had bought for her – mainly books and clothes. She did have mixed feelings about her new kingdom. On one had, she was sure it was spoiling her too much; on the other, she was completely overwhelmed and couldn't help feeling immensely happy.

However, her good mood came to an abrupt end when her honesty got her into serious trouble at school…


	10. Chapter 10

**A little treat to you, my readers :) Who's for ending this story quickly and getting to its spin-off? There'll be Nikola, Helen, Declan and, most importantly, grown-up Rowena ;) What do you think?**

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><p>Rowena never even got the chance to warn Nikola that something was wrong. Her teacher just detained her after school and announced that she needed to talk to the girl's foster father – and she was going to do it immediately: seizing the opportunity to drive Rowena home. As soon as they were there, she sent the girl to fetch Nikola while she waited, politely, she thought, at the front door.<p>

Rowena ran upstairs and knocked on the laboratory door, but didn't wait for a permission to enter.

"Nik," she started unhappily.

"Oh, hello, darling. How was school?" he asked before he registered her expression and the tone of her voice.

"What happened?"

"Miss Brooks is here," she said, cringing her face apologetically. She knew how much Nikola hated strangers at his doorstep, let alone unannounced ones.

"Your teacher? Why?"

"I'm so sorry, Nik… I never meant to get into trouble, I swear…"

He looked at her thoughtfully for a few seconds, and then said, without any trace of anger: "Ok, go to your room, I'll talk to your teacher."

"Please, don't be mad," she begged him.

"Go. I'll come talk to you later," he said and went downstairs to see what the noise was all about.

The woman on the steps outside his door was young, blonde and rather attractive. She looked like one of those enthusiastic teachers at the start of their career, so Nikola immediately assumed she was just worried about Rowena's well-being more than so much disturbed by something Rowena might have done that she would come to wreak havoc on him.

"Yes?" he said without greeting her.

"Oh, hello, Mr. Tesla," she said rather nervously. "I was just wondering if I could talk to you about Rowena…"

"She seems to think she's in trouble."

"Well, not exactly in trouble. We're just worried about her a bit. She's somewhat… defiant in some ways. I thought it best to discuss the matter with you and resolve everything calmly…"

"Ah…" Nikola nodded, knowing where the wind was blowing from now. "Why don't you come in, Miss Brooks?" he smiled at the young woman charmingly and led her into the living room, where he seated her on the sofa while he sat down on the opposite end of it.

"Now, what exactly seems to be the problem?"

"Well…" the teacher started hesitantly, "she doesn't seem too willing to join us in our morning prayers, for starters. She's very lukewarm towards religion. On top of that, she tends to disturb in classes. Not by talking to other children or anything, but she asks a lot of rather… provocative questions. Couldn't you perhaps have a word with her? The school is very concerned for her."

"Yeah, nothing like conformity," Nikola sighed in his mind and out loud he said: "Miss Brooks, the girl lost her father in the war before she was two. She lost her mother in a horrible train crash about a month ago – and she saw it happen. _I_ saw it happen! Dear Alice died in my arms. It was a bloodbath. I think some allowances could be made in Win's case, don't you? She's bound to be somewhat… spiritually lost after such experience."

"I would think that exactly for this reason she should turn to God for comfort."

"Miss Brooks, I don't want to force her into anything. It might prove very counterproductive: she would just deepen her resolve. But I will talk to her and ask her not to disturb the others by being so ostentatious. The same goes for the 'provocative' questions, as you say. She's a bright girl and wants to know about the world. She just doesn't realise that there are things best not discussed in public…"

"… and there are some things that do not allow for discussion," she interrupted him.

He gave her a cold look, but refrained from any objections. There was no point in instigating any conflicts. At least not yet.

He quickly ended the conversation with the teacher and she left with a feeling of relative satisfaction that she had managed to convey her message successfully.

"What. A. Deluded. Simpleton," Nikola shook his head as he closed the door after her. Right after that, he shouted: "Rowena! Come down here!"

The girl sensed his sternness and obeyed sheepishly, with her head down.

"You silly little…girl," he finished, for the lack of a better word. "How many times do I have to tell you the world is not ready for your attitude yet? First of all, if you have any questions, ask me or Annabelle. You know we'll keep nothing from you. And about the prayers… please try to endure them. There's no need to stir up any commotion."

"But isn't it wrong to do something against your conscience, Nik?"

"I understand you, Win, I do. You don't want to pretend. But you won't change these people; they won't ever get it, darling, you can never explain it to them, because it's too deeply rooted in them. They have all been raised to believe, and for some reason, belief is too strong a habit to break. Well, most of the time. There were times, and it's not that long ago, when people maintained that even thinking there's no God was impossible."

"Seems like it's still that way," Rowena remarked.

"Well, people are often weak; they need their faith to sustain them; that's why it's so hard to get rid of it. In any case, please humour them. We don't need to complicate our lives. They might even try to take you away from me if they think I'm neglecting the well-being of your soul. Think of it this way – if there is God, you can score some points by praying with the others. If there's no God, there's no one to care about the hypocrisy, as you think of it."

"I suppose that makes sense," she shrugged. "Although it's far from brave. But I understand. And I promise to behave. But Nik, what about going to church?"

"Let's say we belong to a different church than this town can offer," he winked at her.


	11. Chapter 11

**I know, I promised to upload this earlier. Sorry for that! And sorry for any mistakes, my proof-reading skills are not fully functional ;) Anyway, here's 9+ years in one chapter :D Enjoy!**

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><p>As Nikola promised, Rowena got to see a great portion of the world with him over the years; although he would never take her somewhere dangerous, which ruled out a lot of countries, like the Eastern Blok and parts of Latin America and Africa.<p>

However, he was invited to give a lecture at the recently established university in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, so they seized the opportunity to visit the continent; moving south after Nikola's lecture and exploring the wonders of Tanzania. They stayed at its beautiful coast for a few days, until Nikola became bored with "doing nothing" (= lying on the beach, while Nikola drilled Rowena on school lessons she was missing) and took his daughter inland to see the Great Rift Valley and the Serengeti. They had to stay away from hippos, of course, but otherwise they felt safe, given Nikola's special abilities. Still, at the end of the journey, Rowena was glad they had never had the need to test them against a man-eating lion or some such.

They tried Southeast Asia next, but the climate there had very adverse effects on Rowena, and so Nikola sent her on to Japan, where summer was already at its end and the meteorological conditions were much more favourable. Rowena thus arrived in Kyoto, having two weeks to herself there to explore the city and its surroundings, before Nikola would pick her up and go some of the way back to Nagasaki. Rowena was fifteen at that time and Japanese was one of the foreign languages she had chosen to learn (Nikola, who was a polyglot himself, was very adamant about her knowing at least two). As she actually arrived in the country, she found her ability to speak its language very useful. Not that anyone was ever less than polite to her, but she felt very self-conscious: being a pale-skinned, blonde, green-eyed American girl where a lot of women, on one hand, longed to look just like that, while on the other hand, everyone had every reason to hate Americans for bringing previously unfathomable destruction and shame on the empire, not to mention seven years of occupation. To Rowena's surprise, no one ever mentioned the war or the atomic bombs. Everything was about peace in Japan now.

She had explored a great portion of the city before Nikola joined her, and they travelled together to Kobe to catch a flight to Nagasaki. The way to the airport, of course, led through Osaka, still recovering from the bombings, but that was nothing compared to the Urakami quarter in Nagasaki, which had been obliterated by the atomic bomb. Nikola immediately realised his mistake in bringing the girl here when she started sobbing uncontrollably at the sight of the destruction, but when he showered her with apologies, she just shook her head and said weakly: "This happened, Nik, and I need to know."

Still, Nagasaki had much more to offer than the remains of the Asia-Pacific War. Its scenery was breath-taking, the sea was crystal clear and had the interesting colour of water over limestone. The city itself was a fascinating mixture of different cultures – Japanese, Chinese, Korean and European: it had been a hub of foreign trade once, after all, and there were still remainders here of those centuries long gone. Rowena especially fell in love with the mysterious atmosphere of the dilapidated European villas on the Minami-Yamate hill. Later, this would become the Glover Garden, with all the villas and their gardens reconstructed and open to public, but in 1957, it was barely more than a hidden treasure. In any case, Nagasaki nested itself comfortably in Rowena's heart and made her promise to herself that she would come back there one day.

The place that she often did come back to was Newport, Oregon. This was, however, because it had become a "family tradition" for her and Annabelle to spend two weeks each summer in Annabelle's beachfront holiday home. The ocean had always been like a magnet to Rowena, and the aesthetic attributes it offered along the coast of Oregon made it even more impossible to ever break the tradition of a summer vacation there. Of course, Nikola never saw the attraction of free time, so he always stayed behind, enjoying the quiet of his remote mansion in Galena.

And so years flew by for Win, filled with learning, travelling and, time permitting, hobbies such as ballet and choir singing. At one point, she even became aware that everyone at school had coupled her with Roger, the elder brother from the farm below. The trouble was that no one had ever bothered to ask for her opinion on the matter, including Roger himself, who was more than happy to go along with the public myth. Win always held him at arm's length after the discovery, even though their friendship didn't suffer any consequences – until the time of the Winter Formal arrived, and Rowena was faced with a very difficult decision to make: with whom to go.


	12. Chapter 12

The truth was, Rowena was in love. The fact had slowly dawned on her around the time she was sixteen and the emotion remained with her ever since. The only other person who knew about this was Annabelle, and that was just because when it came to feelings, there was no hiding them from her.

"It does seem like the real thing, doesn't it?" she said to Rowena when the girl gave up and told her all the details. Rowena nodded. Annabelle sighed. "Do you think it's going anywhere?"

"I don't know," the girl shrugged. "I guess not. But I can't very well stop myself from feeling the way I do. Meanwhile, I can't think of anyone I could get to take me to the Winterfest. Everyone basically… well… they think I'm Roger's. And they really do, Annabelle, it freaks me out. It's like everyone, including Roger, thinks I physically belong to him. And he's acting like he owns me, too. He's never asked me to the dance, but I'm sure he takes it for granted that I'll go there with him. He'll just show up here that night, expecting me to come with him."

"Sweetheart, I don't understand. I thought you were friends. But you _are_ scared of him now. Have you told Nik?"

"Nik? What would he do about it?"

"I don't know, frighten him off or something…?" Annabelle offered.

"No. Annabelle, that would just makes me exactly the girl that he takes me for – someone who needs a strong man to protect her. And I just don't want to be that girl for him, and anyway, I'd rather know how to protect myself in case there's no one around to help me."

"Winny, there's no shame in asking for help. And please do it if you start to feel like you can't handle it on your own. I understand you, though, and I think you're right. Unless your sole intention in this life is to get married and live peacefully ever after."

Rowena just shook her head in disgust. Not that she didn't want to get married, but she wanted a certain type of husband, which the local male population just could not offer her. Apart from her secret crush, of course.

In any case, when Roger mentioned the day of the Winterfest that he was going to pick her up in the evening, Rowena already had a scenario rehearsed that she was sure would work. She acted out wounded pride, offended that he had not deigned to ask her first. Roger was extremely surprised by this, and inquired why she would expect him to waste his time on asking her if they both knew they were going together anyway.

"And how did you come to that conclusion, my dear Watson?"

"Win, come on, we spent Homecoming together. We spend a lot of time in and out of school together. Everyone knows that means you're my girl; what is wrong with you?"

"Ok, first of all – I spend time with you and Ralph because you're my childhood friends and we live closer to each other than to any other kids from school. I was at Homecoming with you precisely for that reason, too. And I thought you'd be reasonable and see it for what it actually was – I didn't have a boyfriend, you didn't have a girlfriend, we were in the same class and had been friends for ages, so why not go together? I would never dream that you'd see something more in it!"

"But there _is_ more to it, Win. Everyone can see that. We're meant to be together. I have loved you ever since I can remember!"

It was the first time anyone ever told her he loved her. And she felt sick and violated because this was something that was meant to be beautiful, hearing the words for the first time. You were supposed to be happy and share a shy kiss and there would be metaphorical fireworks, but this – this was scary and disgusting. All Rowena could muster was:

"Stay away from me. I mean it. If you come near me again, I'll have my dad throw your family out of the farm." It was a quiet threat, but she did mean every word of it, and for once, Roger caught the drift immediately, even though he didn't understand her attitude at all. When she turned around and ran out of the school building, he didn't even try to stop her.

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><p>She walked home, and by the time she got there, Nikola had already been told everything by Roger's parents, who had called him, concerned for their future on the farm. Nikola had only told them that he would find out what this was all about, but had promised he would never turn them out of their home without a very serious reason, which he was sure this wasn't.<p>

"And where have you been, young lady?" Nikola scolded when Rowena showed up eventually, having taken her time to clear her head while walking home. It had never been a rule she was required to follow, straight home from school, and Nikola's tone almost offended her.

"I walked. Needed to clear my head. And please never call me a 'young lady' again," she added, knowing that Nikola only did so to annoy, or possibly punish her.

"No, you're not a young lady, are you? How dare you threaten my tenants like that? Have you any idea how scared they were when they called me just now, asking me not to take their home away from them?"

"Oh, God," Rowena sighed.

"Leave God out of this. He won't help you after all those years you've been rejecting him."

"Well, I couldn't well predict that you would turn against me one day, could I? I've been horribly wronged, and what do you do when I try to defend myself? You treat me like an insolent child, and side with the bad guys. Way to go, dad, way to go."

Nikola opened his mouth to scold her some more for giving him the cheek, but she was faster and went on.

"Have you ever seen me threaten people just for the kicks of it? Have I ever intentionally gotten into trouble? No. All these years, I'm trying to be good, I'm working my butt off just to please you, I'm pushing myself harder and further each time even though I know I'll never really grasp some of the things you're trying to teach me. But I do that anyway. And the reason I do that is because I believe you know what you're doing. All this time we're working to change me into someone who can be great, achieve something – and now, when someone wants to take all that away from me, you would let them? You gave me to myself, Nik, and when someone wants to force me to give myself away, you yell at me? Nik, I was so scared…"

At this time she was openly crying, and Nikola, realizing his mistake in the hard approach, grabbed her at once and took her in his arms and held her tightly, gently stroking her hair at the same time.

"It's ok, darling, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he whispered.

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><p>About 40 minutes later, Annabelle arrived. The Winter Formal was an all-family event at Rowena's school, and besides, Nikola had been a respected sponsor for some time now, so it only stood to reason that he and his "sister" show up for it.<p>

Annabelle found Rowena sitting in the kitchen over a second mug of tea, looking fairly miserable, although she could see the worst was already over.

"What happened?"

"I told Roger to stay away from me or Nik would throw his family out of the farm. Idiot took it seriously and told his parents. Nik went down to talk to them about it," Rowena explained curtly.

Annabelle made an understanding face and just said: "Rough day, huh?"

"Yeah, something like that."

"Come on, let's get you all dressed up and pretty. You'll just come with Nik and me. Don't worry, if no one dares to dance with you on account of Roger, I'll lend you Nik. You'll be alright. And you'll show everyone that you have nothing to feel sorry about."

"Suppose you're right," Rowena shrugged and followed her upstairs.

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><p>Annabelle had time to work on herself while Rowena was in the shower, taking care to cleanse herself for the event and let her hair and skin gain a delicate sweet scent, so when Nikola answered the knock on his bedroom door, Annabelle walked in, already dressed and made up. She was wearing an emerald green two-part dress covered with luxurious black lace. Her hair was tied up in an elaborate bun, into which she had stuck a decorative black hair comb. She was wearing a deep red lipstick, but the rest of her face was free of any such accentuating extravagance.<p>

"You look stunning, my dear," Nikola complimented her with honesty.

"Thank you," she beamed at him with her improbably white teeth.

"How's Win coming along?" he wanted to know.

"She should be dressed by now. I'll go there shortly and help her out with her hair and make-up, but wanted to check on you first."

Nikola nodded. "Did she tell you about what happened?"

"Yes," Annabelle nodded, "she did. And I'm glad you managed to smooth things out with your tenants. She was just frightened, you know. You instilled that 'I don't belong to anyone' in her pretty well."

"Well, she doesn't. And who did the little bastard think he was, claiming her as some kind of a trophy like that?"

Annabelle laughed in spite of herself. "I'm glad you see it that way," she chuckled, and then left to see how Rowena was doing.

Some time later, Nikola came up to the front door just to meet with the sight of Rowena descending the stairs. Her slender, if a bit short, figure, was enwrapped in the deep ivory lace of her long gown ornamented here and there by silver embroidered clusters with dark pearls in their centre. A thin belt of silver, rhinestone and pearl applications ran along the division line just below her breasts, while further down, the dress ran straight to the heels of her cream dancing shoes. Over the neckline of the gown, a plain, cream-coloured strip of chiffon was strewn, ending on each shoulder as a light, asymmetrical hint of a sleeve. The part of her throat that was left bare was adorned by a modest silver necklace, matching the drop earrings she was wearing. Her greatest jewel, the almost waist-long blond locks of her hair, fell over her back freely, with only rhinestone hair combs plucked behind her ears, holding back the front streams from falling into her eyes.

Nikola blinked and shook his head a few times, marvelling at the mysterious apparition he was seeing. Was this princess of fairies really his little daughter? How did that happen? And – more importantly – why did the sight leave him unsure of what he was thinking or feeling? He always knew his mind, always had everything under control, but now… he knew nothing.

"You're perfect," he offered when he caught her expectant look.

Somewhere deep down, there was happiness. And pain. And panic.

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><p><strong>I'll leave you some time to ponder the implication. A new chapter will be uploaded tomorrow morning (which is, let's say, in 12 hours). (RE)VIEWS, PRETTY PLEASE?<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

Nikola took a jar out of the fridge, removed the foil from it and poured himself a large glass, half of which he emptied in one go – and as he breathed out in satisfaction, he re-filled the glass, put the jar back and took the glass with him to the living room.

He had not expected to find Rowena there, but when he spotted her, curled up on the sofa with a book, he smiled. However, it was a fleeting smile only, for he immediately spotted that there was something wrong. She looked preoccupied, and he could tell the book was only there for appearance's sake.

"Hello," he greeted her softly.

"Oh, hi," she lifted her head cheerlessly. He could see the synapses in her brain busy at work even then – and the sadness that was creeping into her expression.

"What's troubling you?" he asked, and sat down on the unoccupied bit of the sofa.

"Just been thinking…" she shrugged.

"About…?"

"How long can I stay here with you, Nik?" she answered with a question.

"Until you annoy me so much that I'll kick you out," he retorted without thinking. "But you don't show – and you never have – any signs that that might ever happen, so you can be with me for the rest of your life if you like. On the other hand," he pressed on before she could jump in, "don't you want to get a life? Have a career, start a family, you know – be normal?"

"Are you trying to get rid of me?" she asked defensively.

"No, no, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that you can do whatever you choose, and that I would understand if this life wasn't enough for you anymore."

"Are you insane? You raised me to believe all this, you taught me amazing things – how can I even function in the world outside? Have you even seen it lately? Yes, a girl can get an education, but then? She marries and has kids and that's it! Don't get me wrong, I want to be loved as much as anyone, but where can I ever find someone who would treat me the way you do? Who would believe in me, encourage me, respect me, give me the same – or even half - of the feeling of self-worth that you do?"

"I thought I was being just," he remarked. "Or would you rather I ignored your brain and taught you how to be a good housewife and never expect anything more? That is so not me and you've known it from the start. And you chose to stay with me."

"And you chose to keep me. I thought it was because you cared."

"I do care! Where's all this coming from? I am _not_ throwing you out! If you want to stay, I'll be happy to have you here. I was just trying to show you that you have other options."

Her eyes were full of fear and a certain kind of guilt.

"Please, don't be mad," she begged.

He sighed. "I'm not mad. I simply don't understand what you want from me. If you tell me what kind of a life you want to have, I'll do my best to help you get there."

She looked directly into his eyes, and suddenly burst into tears, which startled him considerably. And at the same time, his subconscious had a feeling it knew where this was going, although it wasn't letting his conscious mind in on the secret quite yet.

"I just don't know what to do," she sobbed. "I don't know who to be, don't know how to live in this world, it's like I'm out of phase with it; like I should have been born in a different age – but there's a window to that age right here and I'm so happy here, but there's something missing, something important, and I just don't know how to get that missing part into my life without losing all this. And I'm terrified because you taught me to rely on myself, but I can't take care of this on my own. I need a nudge in the right direction. But you know the worst part? I know exactly what I want, but it's impossible."

"What do you want, Rowena?" he asked with anticipation. Yes, it was going there. Still, it's already happened, there was nothing he could do about it now. And quite probably it was always going to happen; it was inevitable, given the choices they had both made. And neither of them could have made different choices without betraying their conscience in a despicable way. She was right, it was impossible.

"I want to be with you for the rest of my life. But this relationship is unsustainable. I can't be your daughter forever," she looked at him again. In a way, it was pure reasoning, but as she watched his expression change, she knew it was one she should not have voiced aloud. There was something weird in his eyes, while his whole body shielded itself against her suggestion. The eyes were screaming "I can't", "I feel your pain" and "if only" at the same time.

He got up abruptly.

"I'm sorry, Rowena. I'm really sorry," he whispered softly, grabbed the glass from the coffee table and made for the stairs.

"Nik!" she called after him unhappily.

It broke his heart. And yet he couldn't help her.

He leaned heavily against the door of his laboratory he had just closed after himself. The thought of Rowena still downstairs, curled into a ball on the sofa and crying her eyes out, as he knew she would be, was unbearable. She always dealt with pain like this – trying to make herself as small as possible, preferably invisible, and since this was physically undoable, she did her best to come as close to it as her human form would allow her; melting into the background and keeping her tears to herself.

Nikola hated himself for leaving her alone in this, fearing at the same time he would have make things much worse if he had stayed. He cursed his fate, but his brain was already working around the problem. It sucked big time that they couldn't give in to the mutual attraction. It would get awkward when she gets over sixty. Although, maybe this life of love with everything it entailed would be enough – and then they could just phase out into a pretend mother-son "establishment"…?

After all, this would still happen even if they kept away from the temptation. Would it be less awkward if they never gave in to the desire?

Nikola realized he was lost. He was just doing nothing more than searching for arguments in favour of re-defining his relationship with Rowena. Battling the frustration was both extremely distracting and exhausting; especially since he had been battling it quietly for months now. Rowena wasn't the only one in pain.

His eyes fell to the glass in his hands – but his hunger had shifted to a completely different dimensions. He put the glass on the table to his left and reached for the door handle. Hello, damnation. You're looking particularly alluring tonight.

Even with this in mind, he was still startled when he opened the door to find Rowena standing at the top of the stairs right in front of him. Before he found his voice, she asked sheepishly:

"Do you want me to leave?"

"What? Why?" Nikola asked, completely taken by surprise.

"I shouldn't have said anything – I just made things awkward between us. I could understand if you'd rather have some distance from me," she explained.

"That's the last thing I want, believe me," he said resolutely, although he could feel his nervousness getting the better of him. "Come here," he ventured so that he wouldn't have to pay any attention to it. She hesitated, but he couldn't stop anymore. He walked the three metres that separated them and pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly as if he was going to devour her. She locked her arms around him, overwhelmed by longing, relief, surprise and the feeling of safety, let alone the excitement of his body against hers the way it had never happened before.

He buried his face in the side of her neck, surrounded by her hair, his lips pressed against her skin. She let him stay like that for a while, enjoying it, but then he pulled away, gave her a short gentle kiss on the lips and took her by the hand.

"Let's take it somewhere more suitable," he suggested, and when she nodded, he led her across the landing, quite unexpectedly, to his bedroom.

He suddenly felt elevated, like a schoolboy whisking his first love around the corner for a stealth kiss during a break. This was, after all, what he was doing. The intimacy soon to come would be their secret. At least for now. He shut the bedroom door behind them with one hand and with the other pulled her towards him again, catching her in his arms, his mouth finding hers.

There was a mixture of hunger and shyness in both of them, their actions hindered by the fact that neither of them knew what they were doing. And so they just stood there, exploring each other, slowly revealing more and more bare skin which they would then taste with their lips, silently saying 'this is the only way in which I don't know you yet, and I need to know everything right now'.

When they were almost naked, Nikola lifted her into his arms and laid her very gently on the bed, leaning over her on one elbow and lifting the other hand to caress her cheek.

"Do you want to know a secret?" he whispered softly. She nodded, staring intently into his eyes. "I still haven't done this with anyone," he confessed with sweet embarrassment.

"Good. At least we're even," she concluded matter-of-factly, something that still got him about her without fail, but then caution prevailed and she asked: "Are you sure you don't want to save yourself for Helen?"

"Rowena," he scolded. "Can we leave her out of this? This is strictly between you and me."

"Is it, though? You've always loved her, Nik," she pointed out.

He took a breath to not react to that in a way he'd later regret. Instead, he leaned in even closer, half of his body pressed against hers. Both their breaths quickened at the sensation.

"I have also always loved you, Rowena. Ever since the first moment, there was a bond between us. It has taken us here – and I want to follow it wherever it leads us, unless it means losing you, my darling, because I swear I couldn't bear that."

"Shut up and kiss me," she ordered him, and, gladly, he obeyed. He descended upon her, his lips searching her face and her neckline.

She wrapped her arms around him, increasing the pressure of his weight on her. She felt sheltered and loved and, most importantly, wanted – by someone she'd die to be wanted by. Was this what it was supposed to feel like – like it was meant to happen, like this was where they had always been headed? She would have given anything to know what was going on in his head. But Nikola's brain wasn't really thinking. He had spontaneously come to the conclusion that thinking wasn't actually helping, that he needed to let go and depend on his instincts. The instincts were telling him to get lost in her, and he did, completely.

An involuntary yelp of pain escaped her and he tried his best to soothe her before daring to go on. Quite amazingly, the pain soon subsided and he could feel her relax.

"Is it better now?" he breathed out, while tenderly showering her face with kisses. "Do you want me to stop?"

"No," she shook her head with determination. "I really want this, Nik."

Afterwards, nothing mattered, just the movement of their bodies, the loud and racing breathing, the closeness of each other.

He collapsed beside her, sweating and exhausted, and by the looks of it, she wasn't in a much better condition. There should have been happiness, but it was clouded over by a certain kind of shock in her eyes.

"Win? What's the matter?"

"Nothing. I… think I just can't believe what we just did. Or rather that it actually happened. I never imagined that you could feel about me this way…"

"I do, Win. I love you," he whispered.

"And I love you, Nik," she risked a smile, as if she was still unsure if this was really happening.

That night they fell fast asleep in each other's arms, both feeling complete happiness, such as their lives had never before bestowed upon them.


	14. Chapter 14

Nikola woke up to sunbeams streaming through the window and for a fleeting moment, he felt strangely good. He couldn't remember if it had ever happened that he would sleep through the night. But it wasn't like they had stayed up late, so he had no idea what had made him so exhausted. He was alone now, as if nothing had ever happened. However, there were clear signs, his bare arms and chest being some of them, that it had. The good feeling was suddenly gone.

"Oh God," he moaned miserably, hiding his face in his palms, getting up more slowly than he would have liked to and looking for something to wear.

A pleasant smell led him to the kitchen where he found Rowena having breakfast. There were sandwiches and a mug of warmed blood on the table ready for him, and the phrase "oh God" crept into his mind again.

"Win…" he said quietly.

She lifted her head and smiled at him mildly. It was a careful gesture; she didn't want to be the happy, excited teenager who had a boyfriend now.

"Good morning. I made you some breakfast; it didn't seem like you ate much the whole day yesterday."

"Win…" he shook his head, and her smile vanished, turning into a menacing frown. "You need to go. Look, you got accepted to several universities, just choose one and go. We really can't do this."

She stared at him, looking for words, but all she could find was rage – and a thousand thoughts just nagging her to voice them, so that she had no idea which to say first.

"Seriously? Is that what you're gonna do to me? Take a huge part of me and then throw me out?"

"Win…"

"You bled me, Nikola. You wanted me and you got me; if you didn't know everything about me then, you sure as hell do after last night. We belonged to each other, like we're supposed to! You said you couldn't bear to lose me, for crying out loud! What was that all about, I ask you? Was that a lie?"

"No, it wasn't a lie. But what we did was wrong, can't you see that? You're my _daughter_, Rowena," he replied weakly.

"My parents are dead!" she hissed. "You never adopted me – you consulted me like an adult and we both agreed you would be my foster father. And we both know why you did that."

"It wasn't to sleep with you as soon as you're eighteen!" he protested.

"No. But it was because you knew I would grow up one day, and you wouldn't even look like you could be my father anymore. We always knew this relationship would shift somewhere else one day. So now it has. What's the big deal? That bit of paper? It's irrelevant now! I'm eighteen; I'm no longer under your care officially. You're not committing a crime: you're just shedding the old skin of our relationship and growing a new one."

"Oh, so you think you're a grown up now?"

"Well, one of us has to be!"

"And what's that supposed to mean? You don't think I took good care of you?"

"You have your genius and your knowledge, Nik, but that's all you've got. Not that you haven't tried. But where would you be without me? You'd have Sarah down at the farm to clean the house once a week, you'd have strangers wash your clothes and iron your suits, you'd never eat properly, you'd never have anyone to watch over your daily routine, no one to remind you that it's been too long since you've had your blood, no one to remind you that there are other people in this world. You'd just live in this mansion until it fell on your head because you'd never think to fix anything, too busy with reaching for your bloody Nobel Prize! You'd forget all about _people,_ sitting up here. And I've been here for ten years, studying whatever you wished me to, taking care that you were fed and clad, reminding you of your human side, learning to fix things about the house, never complaining about anything, just being there for you… I've listened and held your hand when you hit a rough patch; I've tried to understand whatever you were doing so that I could nod in understanding. You are so wrong, Nik. We can do this. It's easy, trust me. I've been the stable one. I've been in love with you in this way for two years. It's not me who's reckless and needs to make up her mind. Don't you think I've been through this reasoning? But there's no one else for me, Nik, didn't I tell you? I _know_ that."

"Oh yes, because at your great age that still has the –teen suffix you know all there is to know about the world, is that it? And what's more, you can predict the future, can you?"

"Said the hundred-year-old grandpa who's been sitting locked away up in his ivory tower and only venturing out to society when there's been praise to be received! And you've been in many relationships, have you, that you feel so qualified to lecture me on this topic? Yes, I'm a bloody teenager! What's your excuse?"

"My work, actually," he retorted defensively.

"Oh yes, your work! How could I forget? Oh, yes, I know, because it's never been any good, has it? All you've got to show for your century-long life is piles of patents that you keep locked away in your desk. And, of course, a few million in the bank made from royalties for things you invented decades ago! Is that really what you want to be? Someone who did something good back in the olden days? You're nothing but a spider in a bathroom corner now. Hell, if I hadn't asked you to build me a microwave for warming food, you'd never have realized it can have other uses than a lethal weapon, would you?"

"How dare you?" he spat, his pride and belligerence finally getting the better of him.

"How dare I?" she looked at him with deliberate mockery in her face. "You've just ruined my life, what do I care?"

* * *

><p>Silence ensued. Nikola sat in the kitchen for an hour, picking up pieces of himself wherever she had strewn them. Then, feeling rather numb, he got up wearily and went upstairs. He had heard her go into her bedroom, but everything was quiet there now. He thought better of trying to knock on her door, and instead looked for refuge in his laboratory.<p>

Rowena had cried her eyes out, and when she couldn't cry anymore, she remained lying on her bed, curled up like a hedgehog. When her brain woke up some time later, it found that it was unable to command her limbs to move. There was no strength, no will, no motivation. She couldn't lift a finger at that point if she wanted to.

In the end, she drifted off to sleep, waking up late in the afternoon. She still didn't feel like moving, but when she tried, at least she was able to. She got up and went to the washstand, suddenly very thirsty. She gulped cold water directly from the tap and then washed her face and hands thoroughly, the touch of the rough towel afterwards bringing her strange comfort. It was when she looked away from the sink that she noticed him sitting in her rocking chair, watching her intently.

"Get out," she said softly.

"I can't," he shook his head, stood up and walked over to her. "Win, I never meant to hurt you. And I know I screwed up this morning. But I was telling you the truth, I couldn't stand to lose you, and at the same time, I don't know how to achieve that."

"Oh please. Tell me something I don't know."

"Win, you've got to help me out here. Come on, you were right, you are the wise one. You've got to hear me out and understand why I said what I said this morning. That's what you are, that's what you do, understand things, isn't it? You've always listened…" he pleaded until he was lost for words.

"I'm tired of that. I'm sick of being the good girl and always getting everyone's motives and looking for a way to forgive them. What use is that for me now? You made my secret dream come true and then you turned it into my worst nightmare. And believe it or not, I know why you've done it and I know you never meant to cause me any pain – but what difference does it make?"

"There must be something I can do to make it better…"

"Oh, for God's sake, Nik! All I want you to do is bloody make up your mind!" she exploded suddenly. "That's _all_ you have to do. But I just can't live on like this! First you shut me out, then you decide you want me after all, then you want to send me away, and now you look like you want to take _that_ back. Can't you see how difficult it is? I'm not your play thing. And say whatever you like, I _will_ break down if you keep playing with me like this."

"I don't want to play with you, darling, I'm just so socially useless I don't know how to deal with this. Please, help me?"

Rowena laughed cheerlessly.

"You've just wasted your lifetime quota of self-flagellation, haven't you?" she guessed, and he risked a smile. "Just so you know," she went on, "I realise that and appreciate it."

"Can I kiss you already?" he blurted out impatiently, although his expression was still wary, and it made her laugh. She reached out for him, took his face in her hands and kissed him gently on the lips.

"Oh, thank God," he sighed.

* * *

><p><strong>So, we're coming to the end of our story. Last chapter tomorrow (unless it gets unexpectedly long and I have to cut it in two, but that probably won't be necessary ;). Stay tuned for the spin-off, though! Oh, and... reviews? Pretty please? ;)<strong>


	15. Chapter 15

**So, the last chapter of Rowena. Hope you enjoyed the story - and if you did, you're welcome to follow its spin-off, titled R.A.T.. It will start in January 2012, and although it is primarily about Rowena, there will be all of the "most common" Sanctuary characters, like Helen, of course, the children and Declan (a bit further down the road). So, stay tuned! And... um... reviews, pretty please ;) You know the drill ;)**

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><p>Nikola came to the end of the long sterile, unfriendly corridor and opened the large window, the corridor's only source of natural light and fresh air. He breathed it in thirstily, feeling as if he had been choking all along on the murky air of the hospital. The window was inviting, it just lured him outside, to get out of here run away, run away and never turn back…<p>

He had no idea how long had passed before he realised tears were running down his face. Nothing intense, but all the more inevitable. There was a door waiting to be opened further down the corridor, and when it did, there would be no good news. The message would be of death – and the only gradation would be about how soon it was going to come. Nikola himself felt dead inside: his world had come to its end that gorgeous May morning.

Several hours passed. The door eventually opened and a surgeon came out.

"Mr. Tesla," he called Nikola in a low voice, and he left the window to come face the ugly truth.

"There's good news and bad news. The bad news is that it is, indeed, a tumour, and even more unfortunately, one that's both inoperable and generally irresponsive to radiation treatment. The good news is that it is rather slow in growth, which means your wife probably has fifteen, seventeen more years to live," the doctor informed him. His voice was pleasant, but he was well aware of what news he was delivering, and its tone, therefore, was level and void of emotions.

"She's just turned thirty-four," Nikola responded quietly. The other things – how difficult her life had already been – were pointless to even mention.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Tesla. I wish there was more we could do for her," the surgeon assured him, and by the looks of it, he was honest in this sentiment.

"Does she know yet?"

"Not everything. We want to wait till she's recovered from the seizure and the biopsy properly so that we can have a sit-down with both of you and explain the nature of the tumour to you. You can see her now, though," the doctor offered and when Nikola nodded wordlessly, he was shown into the room where his pale love was lying.

They never married. She had just come to him one day and asked if he would give her his name – and seeing as they had been coming close to the age when a common surname would benefit them, he had let her go along with the idea.

Now she was listening calmly as the doctor explained that her tumour was like a tree whose branches reached into her brain, making it impossible to be removed wholly. She didn't react to the "good news" that she could still have up to two decades to live either. Nikola was watching her intently, trying to guess her thoughts.

She only offered him an insight once she was discharged and they reached home. When he turned to her after closing the front door, he found her laughing.

"After everything," she said. "Would you believe it?"

"Hardly," he answered quietly. "And once more I'm in the position where I want to give up my immortality for your sake – this time to save your own life. Win, if I could die in your place a thousand times over, I would…"

"This is a very stupid way to go, Nikola. I don't do stupid, do you get me? I don't. I'm not dying because some cells find my brain cosy. There will be no dying. Not like this," she said firmly.

"You're in denial," he shook his head sadly.

"And you've clearly given up on me, I see. You want my previous statement to be true as much as I do? Then help me do something about it! Turn me into a bovinepire or whatever it is you are. Invent something that could cut this thing out of me! Find some previously unknown type of radiation that would drive this thing out of me! Better still, let's call Annabelle and ask her to help. She's a healer and she's several thousand years old, and you're supposed to be a bloody genius, so do something and help me!"

There were no tears. She wouldn't let them come and weaken her resolve. She had survived too much to be taken away like this. Something wanted her alive when the train crashed twenty-six years ago, there had to be a reason she was spared – and her existence in this world has barely amounted to anything yet. Or was she supposed to believe that this was a spur she needed to kick her into action and do something great while she still had the time? Erm, hello? Brain function deterioration, anyone up there?

Anyway, never mind all that. The significance or insignificance of her life notwithstanding, it was still her life and her life only to end as she pleased. Nothing and no one would make that decision for her.

This resolve didn't weaken one bit even when the sobbing Annabelle told her over the phone that she had no power over the matters of the brain. Healing the rest of the body was easy – but treading down the complicated pathways of the mind might result in damaging the healer herself, which wasn't anything Rowena would ever ask of her friend.

Two months later, Nikola gave up his research on how to turn Rowena into a sanguine vampiris, realising he was progressing too slowly to finish in time. His partner's reaction to this was a sigh of relief.

"The universe is smart. It knows I'd probably kill half the people in the States before you'd tame me enough to drink from cows," she smiled.

"But I don't know what else to do, Win. I didn't find a way to cut the thing out, I didn't find a way to make you immortal. And I don't want to lose you, not after you've been so brave and you made me believe we were going to make it…"

"Ok, let's think," Rowena stopped him before he could break down. "It's a question of time, isn't it? In both cases. Given time, you'd build a tool that could cut the tumour out completely. Given time, you could find a way to turn me into a vampire. Technology has progressed rapidly since I've been born, there's every reason to believe it will continue to do so. All we need – is time."

"You don't have _that kind_ of time."

"Make it for me."

"What?" he blurted out, utterly confused, but already it was dawning on him where she was headed with this.

"Freeze me. Put me in stasis," she voiced the idea out loud. "You can do that, can't you?"

"Well, theoretically…" he shrugged, and then he literally jumped up and squeezed her in his arms. "Of course I can do that, my love! And I'm going to wake you up in a beautiful, advanced age when everything will be spectacular and perfect and we will be enjoying it together. And then you can die when you're over a hundred years old and you'll pose as my great-grandmother and we'll laugh about it in private," he poured out excited promises at her, making her genuinely laugh. "My people mastered the art of stasis ages ago, and it just so happens that I got my hands on some of their research," he explained a bit more calmly. "I can do it, Win, I promise I can. Everything's going to be ok, darling."

He was far less happy five months later, however, when all was ready. He had been successful in building the stasis chamber; he had taken care of the prolonged need for powering the device, he secured and double-checked everything that posed a potential threat to the smooth running of the chamber – and suddenly all there was left to do was for Win to step into it. At that point, he suspected, he truly realised what was about to happen. They would be separated for an indefinite period of time, possibly decades or even centuries, after having been together for almost thirty years, becoming practically inseparable, being each other's world. He couldn't imagine living a day without her, let alone years. Everything from her smile in the morning, her scent, the touch of her hair on his face and her lips on his; the firm hold of her hand that never failed to give him new energy; her words of support, her insights, suggestions, and most importantly her kindness and love, he would lose all of that the moment he switched the device on. He tried to find consolation in the fact that even though it might last a lifetime or two, it was really just temporary, but it already felt too much like his heart being ripped from his chest and fed back to him. He wept, and when she found him, she took him gently in her arms, speaking to him softly and stroking his hair.

"My angel, my angel," he sobbed, "what ever will I do without you?"

"You will try to find a way to bring me back to you, and you will hope and never give up," she said. "And if it takes too long and you think you might have strayed, or ran out of ideas, you will stop and pause and take a rest, and then you will get up and fight for me again, because that's what I need you to do. You have the power over my life and death now, my love, I give it to you. But you must never let me die, never let this kill me, do you understand?"

There was no threat, no desperation in her voice. She believed in him, and was giving him courage to do what needed to be done. But she had every faith that he could pull it through, and they would meet on the other side of the bridge they were building.

They did not sleep that night; they kissed, made love and made sure they would both remember each other completely for the empty time stretch gaping in front of them. Then, in the morning, they shared their last breakfast and presently Annabelle arrived, to be there for _the_ moment. Time went by while they held and kissed each other, trying to savour the feeling and convey a thousand messages through their touching bodies. Rowena was the first to break off, eventually, taking a deep breath to retrieve her courage and stepping into the chamber. But just as Nikola nodded in understanding and was about to close it after her, she flew back into his arms, covering his face with kisses and holding him tightly.

"Remember what I told you, Nik. I love you, and I believe in you. Be strong for me, darling, you can do this," she whispered in his ear.

He nodded again, although his eyes were brimming with tears. "I love you too," he whispered, as she stepped back into the chamber and let him close the door for good, so that he wouldn't see her own eyes betraying her, salting her cheeks.

The system sprung into action, and by the time the noise subsided in favour of the constant low humming it would perpetually give out, Nikola was writhing on the floor, sobbing hysterically and whispering Rowena's name into Annabelle's consoling shoulder.

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><p><strong>THE END<strong>


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